Gate 57 Line 3 Acuteness
In the collective and in the tribe, there is no recognition for Reflectors, they are not seen/acknowledged, asked, initiated, prodded. Except talked about in the third person sense.
Only in individual interaction, are they seen
and maybe/perhaps even praised for their impact and influence, their razor sharp perception and guidance. Yet, however, even then not by many.
For the hard hearing and newbies: the HD ‘community’ is most certainly not excluded from this. Just mechanics and duality.
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MoonBlog 47.2 Ambition
Once gone through the Rave Cosmology series, none of it/this matters anymore. These concepts (gods, spirituality and their supposed containers to what is and is not included and which modality includes what part of this or that) just become superfluous, and that was fun to experience.
When things don’t need to make any sense anymore, cause conceptualising it makes no more sense.
Seeing that only the ego/mind seeks to hold on to them, or identify, or use as a crutch, or even as a navigational tool (living strictly by the rules of a religion or dogma or spiritual belief etc)
When you experiment and notice when you drop a few, as a test, nothing happened. Until you drop it all, and still nothing happened. Nothing bad per se. Looking at life through as little lenses as possible.
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Knackered and fuckered
I visited a buddy on Sunday, helping with the settings on his 3d printer that we modified together
He tells me on monday he is not going to work cause he got a high fever
I feel my throat a little but an occasional cough is not that weird
The next morning Iām fucked and fucked over. Itās like all my nerve endings are firing as if there is pain, muscle aches but also serious brain aches, my jaw, my teeth, inside my teeth, inside my brain, my neck
The internet says; no cure, wait it out, up to max 10 days
And I could have sworn paracetamol used to be 4x 2 tablets a day, is now max 6 per day total.
meanwhile the builders want to install the city/water heating, but theyāre not coming cause the neighbours are not also home, so I wait and wait, till I finally get back into bed
Wait, comma, pause.
I sleep another 9 hours, in between I have some little foods, and more paracetamol, and just sleep, or try to.
then some tv watching in the middle of the night, now, the next morning, my multiple aches seem gone but my throat hurts real bad. And Iām so tired, pffff
Put on some thermo underwear, but still a little cold, brrrr
Which reminds me of:
47.4 Repression. The constraints of external oppression.
Exalted: The strength of identity that even in times of the most powerful oppression can maintain its resources and to some extent ensure their survival for the benefit of others. A sense of identity that can be maintained despite external conditioning.
Detriment: When robbed of its light, the Moon is lost in darkness; barely able to nourish itself, let alone others. The identity overwhelmed by external conditioning.
Right is Might
So one of the things Iām noticing, especially in my more personal/intimate relationships, is how the other will consistently weigh and measure you with self made-up measuring sticks, including HD, as a means to badger you with ego proving gibberish.
Weaponizing HD, but mainly psycho-analysing you through HD, without the credit HD also gives the Types, only the negatives are seen/measured and then thrown at you, for good āmeasureā.
Sure we can talk about my autism, that āhe always sits at his computerā. It is not untrue.
But what are -you- offering instead, great conversations?
And even if so, then one needs breaks from those too, per my Type. Perfectly fine per my Type, per my correct behaviour, per what is correct -for me-. And, your pussy is not that good.
This constant needing to prove ones self, instead of just being human and porkin out, breathing, acclimatising, vibrating, ondulating, contemplate, let it simmer, marinating, or maybe even fucking oblivion. While they’re demanding super human behaviour, or even super human design behaviour, you -have to be- perfect, or else.
And what was then the attraction, you may ask? Energetic, frequency, something to connect with. You connect or even bond energetically, there is a connection.
However, initial connections are never truthful, everyone is always hiding, hiding something, some things. And then slowly slowly they open their mind to you, and that is when the poop starts to pour out, the horse shit, the hurt, the anger, the anguish, the self pity and the external blame(s).
Suggestion: read their blogs first, read their online interaction and skirmishes, first. See if you like -that- person. Cause so many people, are simply very hurt, very broken. Some internalize this and seek some form of comfort or healing, and some only externalize and bite your head off, first chance they get, first thing you āsay wrongā.
This is my āmistakeā, cause you jump to the energetic connect, but youāre going to interact with that broken ego/mind too. You will definitely meet it.
Pretending it is part of the experiment, this constant measuring with HD or anything else, this consistent moralistic badgering, pretending to be in the experiment, or being a good (whatever the fuck your Type is)
This constant need to prove behaviour, or be psychologically dissected on anything/everything the whole mf-ing time.
Whichever lens they use, but always as a weapon, never as a means to explore for instance.
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Tonite
Interpretations are mind
It’s mental masturbation pretending to celebrate minds limitations. It is ego/mind patting itself on the back for being stupid.
I guess
Iām fed up with all the psychological issues of people, not with HD, but how people need psychological and often emotional assistance (and a cuddle or fuck), but then go to/through all these modalities, so called self help journey into some form of psychology spirituality, when they actually, or also need psychological assistance. Like I need it now, after trying to help and support myself and so so very many people for 15 whole years (last friday) through HD.
Iām pooped, Iām wasted, I donāt have the stamina anymore, or at least this is how I perceive it š
The horrific stories I have heard and listened to, trying to support people with, pfffrf, I canāt take it anymore. Many of you/me/we/us are fucking crazy!
MoonBlog 56.1
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MoonBlog 41.2 caution
I guess, Iām seeing 3 ‘levels’
1. how we behave from the mind/not-self in the 7 centered world as if we are 7 centered. Some parts are self, inescapably, yet most is a huge exaggeration of that which we are not. References to the HD chart are usually/mostly a mis interpretation, just mind trying to make a non solvable puzzle fit/stick. If you push this button, you get this result. The land of psychology and being unhinged.
2. how HD describes us according to our chart, after at least 7 years deconditioning, at least, obliterating/annihilating ‘level’ 1. A new baseline of interacting with the world. If you push this button, we donāt know what the results will be, yet stability?
3. just living S&A (and sometimes not), in part even transcending ‘level’ 2, which then becomes information but not truth and simply doesnāt fucking matter anymore as you can simply be, dualistically yourself, in all kinds of colors and shapes and movement and behaviour, untethered. As an observable result, but nothing to strive for or manipulate towards.
Fuck any button pushing, complete irrelevance.
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Tense past
Today the feeling has passed somewhat, but over the last weeks, if not months I get this incredible sense of depression, when I think about how we are living on this Earth. How societies operate, that we all need to make some money to live, and most of people, just barely scrape by.
Does not matter if you live in France, or in Thailand, USA, the Congo, Morocco. This notion of humanity and evolution and technological advances, hampered, and interrupted, by this constant need for just the basic needs, barely. Again and again and again.
How even if here in the Netherlands, almost everyone got a 10 percent increase/raise, it was called for cause the prices had already increased by more. Even if everyone would get say 200-400 bucks a month more, the market would immediately adjust for sucking up the difference.
It is, however unintentional, rigged.
Of course this was triggered by my own shaky financial situation, which is now a bit more stable once again, but as a Reflector looking at yours; my friends, my loved ones, my network and far far beyond, I feel really fucking down and depressed.
Wanted to let you know, somehow, I see and it hurts.
MoonBlog 9.3
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I did a thing today
I deleted my Reflector Sessions webpage and blog access, Reflector Sessions Facebook page and its linked Baffo Instagram page
I no longer wish to be that āadvertorialā or using these as identifiers, of me, of what it is to be me.
It just does not matter (anymore) in this format or way.
I might rejuvenate the website with my MoonBlogs and the 2 Reflector pages, but as Sjef, not as some identity called āReflector Sessionsā.
MoonBlog 51.5
[edit] from 3422 to 0, back to 267 873 posts on blog now
an appearance, an identity, it weighed on me to keep it up or maintaining it as such. People are looking for (a) structured support, and I was providing that in this way. Seeking things to be businesses, schools, āprofessionalsā, with registrations and certifications, tax deductible formats and whatever else.
But Iām just me, and thatās fine/enough.
If I do this now…
to observe the mind, through my undefined Root center with no activations.
āIf I do this now, then it is done, I donāt have to focus or worry about it anymore.ā
Mind, is doing all of that, both, the worrying and the not worrying, the false pretense in both situations.
Why does it worry so much about stuff anyways, whether done or not done. As it needs, seeks to park stuff, done ā ok
not done ā worry, or at least throw it in front of the minds/eye often enough.
Sure I donāt mind completing things/tasks, but this ego/mind seeks to do so only so it can let go of it, as it holds on to outcomes and progression, tallying, measuring, comparing. Control issues much?
MoonBlog 22.5
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Personal Health Syndrome (PHS)
In HD conversations, there seems to be this notion of, when you live your design, and when you apply your PHS then you will be healthiest.
But there are nuances, as always, just not in the conversations.
Recently my doctor emailed she’s going with her pension, and I’ve been with her since the beginning, 33 years ago. And before my Saturn return I’ve seen her maybe 5-6 times in about 11 years, of which I was abroad for 3 years. Since on the roof, about 5-6 times also in a period of 20 years, and since my kiron Return just 4 years ago, already a dozen times.
Something has definitely changed
And in my PHS reading, I was told and then reminded multiple times: ‘the mutation is not always successful” & “this roof phase is the healthiest for you, it will change”
So, yeah.
(MoonBlog 38.2)
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Who is driving?
In HD we know the terminology of the Magnetic Monopole being the driver
and for me, especially after having done the 4 Transformations year training, I can see the concept of Driver, Vehicle and Passenger so much better.
But also, to see, who else is driving, all these variants of my mind. Wearing different hats.
When sex is driving
when money is driving
or the drive for money is, driving.
When need for recognition
for compliments
for acknowledgment
for likes
for pleasure
for good food
feel good
to feel better, is driving
with their little hats (ā¦ whatever š ), and driving gloves, all purrdy and neatly dressed, up.
For driving.
The ego/mind, driving, for ego, for ego/mind. As an expression of itself, driving. Not the magnetic monopole driving, no. The ego/mind, almost like someone with Alzheimersā, doing something they did in the past, and ending up in the weirdest places, only to be brought home, by the cops.
It is such a show, such a drama, dramatic expression. Of ego/mind all dressed up, for driving, and then actually drive, completely out of place, yet driving as if it was correct. āFake it till you make itā.
Oh and that it does š
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Projected Attitude: Abdicator
I enjoy being an Abdicator (Profiling Gate of the 4th Line), so very often in my life Iāve been āpromised the worldā by criminals, by teachers, by lovers. And oh so many times, I just said no. It was not for me, and I walked away or moved on. And then looking back on those situations, what if, I had said yes? And I chuckle, cause Iām so glad I simply did not š
Criminals, proposing working together and ādo stuff with diamonds and passportsā and āIāll come live with youā and I just goā¦ neeeeh. Shacking my head š
In the GeneKeys, where the American LLC, who tried to take over the show after RR had sex with one of them, where grooming me to become a ācertified Guideā, and I just laughed and told them, you aināt got that capacity to do so, there is nothing there in your offer, it is hollow, and left/moved on.
My Advaita Vedanta teacher, saying, āyouāre so close to realization, and then you can teach othersā. She was grooming me, to be a non duality teacher, to become āone of themā. And when I look at Adyashanti teaching this stuff, talking about things, I realize, I would never want to sit in a chair and talk about life before, talk about the horrors of the mind and how to look at it differently so you can wake up. Not in a non duality way anyways. I mean, doesnāt he have hobbies? Is this the end result of āenlightenmentāā¦? Neeeeh š
A lover who wanted to work together teaching HD, using the 64 material ways to doā¦ yeah what exactly I wasnāt sure, I had never read or listened to the material, and when I tried, I was seriously put off by it. And the pussy wasnāt that good either (no offense, but I mean, the relationship was not of equals) but, these promises just donāt work on me, unless, it is correct -for me-. There is no way to seduce me unless it IS seducing, to ME š
The new Reflector organization that is being āmadeā, to be asked to be part of the tip of the spear is nice and all, but I just donāt have the energy, or desire, the drive, the be part of that tip. Once it runs, sure I may show up and be part of its structure, and be of service to the other, maybe.
Iām so happy that I walked away and moved on, and just do whatever the fuck I want, through my PHS Tone, my individual creativity. And use S&A when others are involved, but they so rarely are, itās just me and my Tone.
I have no need for the groomers, I have no need to even use S&A on them, I abdicate. And that makes me smile, when I look at the mud they seem to be plunged into. Sticky mud, using so much energy to maintain the āthingā, and I could see, it was just not for me.
MoonBlog 36.5 The underground.
Gate 36 of crisis. The darkening of the light.
The rule of cycles in which decline is a natural but not enduring stage.
Gate 36 Line 5 The underground
Exalted: Perfected survival regardless of conditions. Immunity to crisis as both generator and survivor.
Detriment: A nervousness that can lead to self-betrayal. Self-betraying nervousness in times of crisis.
SunBlog 19.2 service
Weirdos in the mail
Weirdo: I would love if you could unblock me on facebook so that I will be able to see your content and your interventions HD related.
I remind you you blocked me for my stupid comments, that’s over. i wont text you or tag you
me: which is the same weirdo: https://www.mcha.nl/2022/06/28/sunblog-52-4-self-discipline/
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index_old
How did you get behind this wheel?
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[reflector pondering]
[reflector pondering]
In background news programs it is common to say
“last week Harry said this, and I want to comment on that”, saying that
in HD we don’t see this at all
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MoonBlog 11.6 adaptability
Koen Hillewaert : “an open head, open ajna has second hand thoughts and inspiration… not first hand… so the thoughts we have, the inspiration we have is not ours, it came from somebody else. Just like an undefined solar plexus gets and multiplies the emotions from the other…”
[reflection:]preposterous
Just because we don’t have -consistent access to- the Solar Plexus, does not mean we do not have emotions of our own, ever, at all.
Or thoughts.
This is one of those things that get said in HD that really go too far, are being taken literal, for having been an analogy.
If and when being in aura with someone else, there is the -potential- to take in and amplify theirs, but it is not singularly true, all the time. You can sit with them, they get emotionally triggered, and you not. The Natural and Healthy State of the Undefined Solar Plexus is: emotionally quiet. And this can happen perfectly fine in aura with others.
Never your own thoughts, what a lot of bullcrap is that man. I live and spend so much time alone that I can tell when it is yours or mine. And much of the bullshit I think, is truly mine… well ok, it’s my minds.
Such a notion pretends there is no true self behaviour in undefined centers.
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Just another experience of duality
On Wednesday, ā29 āJune ā2022, āāat 10:17:16
I never tried to sell her anything, we spoke about it when we met, surely, we spoke about what each of us does (pic on the right)
I already did not like that she paid for the dinner we had, as if to either prove something, or to buy a favour later.
It was her then on July 29th 2022 asking:
“Hey wassup? How much is your lyd course?” (see pic11)
And since I was preparing for it, I was busy, or chilling, like non-energy people do. But this, apparently, is not allowed (hehe, right…)
or straight answers to questions like ‘are you?’ “No”
And then of course, after this strange communication break down, telling -everyone- what a horrible person I am, just for being present, as myself. For telling her I masturbated, as if nobody ever does, or one is not allowed to speak about these things, in honesty and openness… and safety. Or that the communication got weird. No idiot, you smoke(d) so much weed!
But also looking back, clearly a (self (over) identified) person(ality) that asks for help, with the stress, the burden and whatever else, but does not actually seek help, does not actually seek support or outside viewpoint suggestions, at all. Is only seeking praise for the struggle and efforts, while remaining a victim of the outer circumstances and keep wallowing in their own supposed victimization. So they can keep pointing outwards, this person, that person, or this situation, bad, bad, bad. Luring you in with smiles and meals, but it’s a sticky web of self indulgent manipulative locked up horrors, and if you do no adhere, or heel (!), it was all your fault š
So yeah. just another toxic, helpless and incompetent moralist bullshitter, running through the Human Design ‘community’ carousel like a dog with rabies, foaming at the mind, with all the pretence and pretends. Rising through the so called ranks, of nothing, of emptiness. So 2 years later they can make a documentary about HD without it being about HD, thinking they ‘need to initiate’, calling themselves ‘director’, cause no one is living it, they’re just talking about it, chasing the dragon of want, wanting to adhere to something good, bettering humans and humankind, without ever bettering. To Live Your Design is not a group(ed) effort !
Aaaah beautiful stinky messy Duality…. Thanks for the experience all the same š
“Is there anyone here who has experienced, and made it through apathy and prolonged depression during their HD experiment?”
when I smoked pot & hash every day, when I took LSD for the better part of a year, when I was a severe alcoholic, when I was homeless, when I was in prison, when I came out of prison, when I was single. When my mind was running the shitshow.
But never so much anymore since/during my HD experiment. But my life has been radically changed (well one could call it that, I kinda like it, so the comparison is just words) cause I occupy my left/active brain as much as possible with things that I enjoy.
Tinkering my ass off, with guitars, guitar effect pedals, amplifiers, modding them, tweaking and nerding. Since almost 2 years I got a 3d printer now THAT can keep you occupied !! š
and am looking forward to tinker with a cnc milling machine next, besides the motorbike(s) tinkering I always did.
“Sjef, why does your living room look like a barn?” she asked.
Because I can !
And, I only watch what I download myself, ie movies/tv-shows. And when I travel I take a vaccin if required. I no longer occupy my mind with the world, and it’s supposed issues, but mine only. I have become much more myopic, not even on purpose per se, not even as a mental strategy, but I do know it works for me.
Am I chasing only happy states? No, in the least, my daily life is not easy, but I know what I want to do with it, now, with the opportunities I now have. If I win the lottery those may change, but for now, I’m pretty damn good.
And then a few days of relapse, deep darkness, sadness. Mind projecting me all these things again. Ah well, time for another nap, or perhaps to level the bed once more (technical 3d printing term) š
Make/have dinner, clean the house/barn, pffrt (blowing raspberry)
you know, I consider my life, and how it’s run, as a job. And I love my job, and I love me. So I try to do a good job. And work on it every single day. What is correct for me, what can I or can I not do/have/be today, enjoyable long term strategies planned, but adjusted as need be. Me, my life, one job. Every day.
Some times it is nap day, sometimes it is not ?
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‘Cause we need a little, controversy
to all moralists, liars and other 5 centered idiots,Ā Sjef says: “of the 12 women into HD that had sex with me, averaging not even one HD sex partner per year of being into HD
about 4 have I taught any HD before the sex, with well over 200 that is averaging less than 1 in 50
the other 8 I either never taught or it was after the sex.”
If you read some of my writings and sharing and happen toĀ experience a drive to ānotā connect, great. If you do experience a drive to connect, great, you are hereby invited, asked, informed and initiated to do so through theĀ contact page.
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“are you interested in a romantic relationship with me?”
Im starting to get his sense that it (…) does not hinge on information or correctness, but all about emotional (im)maturity, some are born with/out and the rest is consequence, unless they grow some/more, as the only real growth path out there worth anything.
MoonBlog 53.2
Gate 53 of beginnings. Development.
Development as a structured progression that is both steadfast and enduring
Gate 53 Line 2 (exalted) momentum. Success breeds success
Exalted: The protection of early success nurtures further achievement. The pressure to start something new based on past success.
Detriment: A tendency with early success to haste and imprudent action. The pressure based on success to be impatient for something new.
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“I need to be using that”
From https://open.spotify.com/episode/3322aexbe0DWboM8kXg7au
03:46 “When I look at the FaceBook scene, for example, and there is so much information being passed around, and my mind gets right into it, and I like to debate information and I like to see different angles of it and I usually see weird things that people don’t and I could be wrong and whatever, but… But none of that interaction on facebook around the content like that, has anything to do with me being a manifestor and in fact, it is probably distracting me, like moment by moment, from being a splenic manifestor cause I’m up in my thinking head instead of in my body.”
When you own a bicycle, and watch tv, you do not all of a sudden, not own a bicycle, because you are watching tv.
Unless the bike was stolen in between, but not because you were watching tv, but because someone stole it.
Other than that, you still own a bicycle.
Interacting on FaceBook in HD groups, or in messaging etc, has -nothing- to do with decision making per your Inner Authority. Anyways, being in your thinking head, when it comes to working with information is perfectly normal, and it’s even legal too.Ā There is no law against it. Against using mind, against being in your thinking head. It is irrelevant, to being whichever type, or whichever Strategy & Authority you may have.
It is pretending however, there is a better way, of doing things, ego/mind, undefined ego/heart center proving ones self to be right, or even correct, when that can not be the case ever since it was irrelevant to begin with.
The mistake is causality and strawman arguments; ‘One is not allowed to be in their thinking head, one should always be in the body’.
When in fact, mind = a wonderful Outer Authority, it is not dis-allowed to think. Or process information, or exchange information.
Only when making decisions with that same mind, as Inner Authority, does it become a not-self act, or action.
But watching tv, or interacting on FaceBook, does not change if you are a boy or a girl, if you need to pay taxes or are owed taxes, being a splenic manifestor, none of that.
You are still in the same body, you may not be consistently conscious of it, but who/what is conscious of it anyways but that same mind that is now thinking and processing information, while you being perfectly fine in the body also? You did not change body, or Type, you are simply not using S&A and there is no reason (‘need’ to) to do so either. You’re off the hook. You are on a S&A break: processing info, thoughts, viewpoints, shooting the shit.
The outer circumstances, and you being in them, participating, does not cause anything to be wrong, just by being there and doing this or that, by being able to discern, yes, my mind is distracted right now… well actually, distracted from what, is there an agenda all of a sudden, a goal, a fixedness of dos and don’ts of behaviour, of what is deemed correct according to some made up moral standards? Are we inflicting guilt on ourselves for watching tv, pretending this makes us lose bicycles?
Nice example of a mental belief structure at work, of using mind to make decisions with and not ‘be in the body’ while pretending to avoid exactly that in the first place š
MoonBlog 52.3
“Why?”
I don’t know ‘why’
I am not interested in my mind knowing, why
or seeking to verbalize it, mentally, even wording it, to explain it, either.
All I know is, I am doing it, and that, is why.
And having great fun doing so
I can explain, in hindsight, how I got here, but not, why.
MoonBlog 52.2
MoonBlog 51.2 withdrawal
Weirdos in the mail
weirdo: Calling all #Reflectors (according to Human Design)!!! ?
Are you a reflector and feeling all the feels? Could you use some relaxation and a deep energetic reset in a loving environment where people just get you?
Join me this Sunday, online, at 10am PST for an hour of group-supprted Reiki healing for your highest good. āØ
It’s going to be magical! ??
Leave any questions you have below!
Hi There! How are you doing today? I’m reaching out to let you know that I’m hosting a Reiki for Reflectors group call again this Sunday at 10am PST. Would love for you to join us!! Would you also be down to post to your page or story to get the word out to all the Reflectors in the world who could use this? Thank you so much!! ???
me: Hi, only see your message now (y)
No, not down to doing that.
MoonBlog 19.3 dedication
I only have to find my own correctness in it, yours or anyone else’s has nothing to do with my S&A.
My correctness, is not a stance, nor is it something I take, and therefor not need to defend nor explain.
Besides correctness not being logical, anyone pretending that my correctness is their business, is mistaken.
This goes for any and every topic.
MoonBlog 19.3 dedication
Gate 19 of wanting, approach. That all things are interrelated is apparent and manifested through the action of approach.
Gate 19 Line 3 dedication. Receptivity to approach can only be maintained through vigilance.
Exalted: The natural ease with which communion is maintained. Sensitivity and ease fueled by acceptance by others.
Detriment: A tendency to moodiness that may lead to carelessness. The need to be wanted hampered by oversensitivity.
How to De-condition? (Effectively)
By actually going there. So not only think about Human Design and your chart and all its details (while also important), not just contemplate the information and its implications (while also important), not just study Human Design (which for some is quite important), but by actually going there, by trying to live it, by making mistakes, by experimenting and experiencing, by comparing your experiences with the theory and other peoples stories. By learning to not only understand but having the experience, of which energy is yours and which is not yours through Transit Cycle tracking and journaling. Deconditioning is something we do.
And if you need support in doing so, find that support.
The how question is one of mind, but mind can not solve it, not ahead of experiencing at least. It is not within the capacities of mind to ever solve it. We factually need to go and experience it, ourselves. We can talk about what it was like doing so, with others, but hearing what it was like, for others, does not decondition -you-.
You simply have to experience it yourself.
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MoonBlog 3.4 charisma
To me, our world is real ugly
these ugly streets, the traffic, the endless traffic lights
those shitty houses, the even shittier tiny showers
in all countries I’ve seen
the only thing I enjoy, is the connection with other people
the interaction, they make it beautiful
Moon Blog 3.4
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MoonBlog 14.4 security
The Transit chart shows the chart of today, so ‘Personality’ side
But nothing gets imprinted, cause this only happens twice in life, 88 Solar degrees before being born (which then becomes the Design imprint) and then at birth (the Personality side). Everything else, is not you, is the weather, an external influence.
So the Transit chart of now, does not even have a Type, since Type only emerges out of the Juxtaposition of Design and Personality together, of 2 imprints of Crystals only. Type is form functioning. It can not be separated.
Then the quote, linked from my blog (https://www.mcha.nl/2020/12/13/moonblog-34-5-annihilation-2/). As I write it there also, but I’ve heard it is not that clear, so I reword it here:
The Transit chart looks very open, yes, but it does not mean, that everyone will experience these Transits, or not experience them (!). Not Reflectors, not other Types either.
I do not have Gate 30 activated/imprinted in my chart, nor the Gate at the other side of the channel, Gate 41. but when the Transit is in Gate 30, and this could be the Moon, or the Sun, or Jupiter. I can experience deep emotional overwhelm. And, this is a pattern, it happens often when something is in Gate 30.
Even when the Transit chart shows ‘no definition’, and I don’t have neither Gate 30 nor 41, and exactly this, this noticing, this observation from experience, is half the story of the Lunar Cycle.
There is no homogenized effect on anyone else (or at least, not forced/fixed) to experience cosmic baths, openness or the opposite, when Transits happen. It can only be, your own unique experience, which by journalling you will find out, how -you- sample life, differently, than I do, or any other Reflector does.
That really also is the power of Human Design, to become your own observer and finding your own truth, without having to listen or believe anyone else. Experientially. To become, your own Authority.
Enjoy š
MoonBlog 14.4 security
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“You have the design of a reflector, and the personality of a reflector.”
or
“[whomever] is a 6/2 Splenic Projector and non-specific manifestor in Human Design.”
Both are simply false, easy to tell too; just count your aura(s)
Type (ie Reflector) is form, is aura functioning, there are no Types in either side of the chart. One can say: I’m undefined in my Design and undefined in my Personality, or I have only Projector Type Channels/Definition, but one is never another Type in any one of them, it is the Juxtaposition of both, that makes Type and Aura. Only in the quantum of both is Type revealed.
So yes openness, but the Definition is there always, we can not separate the Design and Personality like this, they are locked together, even me as a Reflector don’t have those 2 Types on either side
You only have one aura.
P.S. do you -have- a design or personality, some false identification there?
And if you -have- it, where do you keep it, store it, does it eat anything, where does it sleep?, etc š
MoonBlog 22.3
Gate 22 of openness, grace. A quality of behaviour best suited in handling mundane and trivial situations.
Gate 22 line 3 the enchanter. Perfected grace.
Exalted: Form as a definition and actualization of substance. The possibility for perfected openness through the alignment of emotional energy and awareness.
Detriment: Unconscious grace. An innate openness.
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MoonBlog 62.3 discovery
Human Design will never be a respectable modality because of all the free-loaders, hoarders, interpretations & misunderstanding, snake oil sales(wo)men and unprofessionals sharing it and selling it.
Discuss
[unfollow topic]
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MoonBlog 63.5 affirmation
Weirdos in the mail
weirdo: “Removing my ability to comment or discuss my take on being a reflector highlighted to me the health of your group so Iāve kindly left. I wish you all healing xxx”
me: “I have done no such thing
I’m not the admin/mod there
but the about rules of that group are quite clear
there are no takes, only experiences. The rest is just mind fodder”
weirdo: “Mine was all experience x”
me: “Wishing healing is pretending something is wrong with those other people, making you a moralistic fascist
mirror mirror on the wall”
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MoonBlog 63.3 continuance
A new experiment (and I hate it already) š
Most people know I live a ‘one thing lead to another’ kinda life. Soup of the day for the Reflector, restaurant analogy, yes? And some things that happen this way are absolutely amazing (positive) and some things are absolutely amazing (negative) š
Now my PHS is Color 2 (Taste) and Tone 1 (Smell) making my Taste Open, those are splenic binaries. Through my PHS I have access to a discerning spleen. I’m a natural nose breather and closing my sampling is mouth breathing. And I have Gate 20, twice, one of them my Design Moon, and I call my not-self an emotional manifesting reflector, so there is a lot of immediacy (and a few other Gates allowing me to jump into hyperspace and the opening of the heavens) and all that and more.
I do a lot of tinkering, nerding, melancholic muse driven mind puzzles with musical instruments gear (guitar pedal sequence setup and wiring, amp combinations, tube rolling) and motorbike tweaking (gear ratios, air filters, carb and exhaust tweaking) and recently also some more electronics as in guitar pedal making and now a vacuum tube tester, and so on.
So a lot is bought and sold all the time, all, the, time. Including lots of tools and machinery to do all those things. Which I enjoy a lot. A lot of research goes into it, and I do quite well in finding just the right thing, over time, reading all the reviews and having gained more knowledge and hands on experience of some of the procedures and techniques over the years.
Right now I’m diving into model making, gluing shaped pieces of plastic together and then painting them. Brushing these paints on, looks hideous. So I need an airbrush set-up… (and learn how to use it)
The new experiment is, wait, comma, pause, one lunar cycle before buying anything, -anything-. Everything.
Oh boy….
I already don’t like this… š
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MoonBlog 41.4 Correction
in my perception, there is no snow
in my presence, in my body
inside
there is no weather
inside
outside
there is snow
and the streets are slippery
walking is difficult
becoming bitter cold
at night, outside
inside
there is no weather
not even windstil
inside
there is
only absence
of weather
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Moonblog 49.6 attraction
reflector sampling, or… not-self? š
I once bought a Digital Multi Meter. Hadn’t had one in a while and building guitar pedals, working on motorbikes and what not, they come in handy. So I buy a new one from a so-so brand for about 40 bucks I think. Conrad’s own Voltcraft VC175.
At one point it stops working, all I get are four dashes – – – – and not 0.035volts for instance.
So I try to find another one to replace it, second hand this time, and preferably a brand. I find one that looks a bit crummy but is super easy to use and has all the functions that I think I need and it’s a Fluke, 113 model. Stil twice the price of the other one new, but hey, its a Fluke.
Once home I clean the outside up a little with water and soap and use it, and it’s great. Until I need to do some tests and I get weird results. I even end up sending the pcb elsewhere for testing and finding out what is wrong. Turns out, all the tests run fine, my meter is off ! So seemingly fully functioning, but wrong values.
So I decide to scour the interwebs for advice for another one. Cause I’m not that enthusiastic about getting a ‘better’ 200 bucks Fluke this time, even if I love my gadgets and I like well known stuff, but let’s see what the experts have to say. There I find there are kinda 2 camps, the cheapos and the semi-professionals. The cheapos advice the Aneng AN8008 or AN8009 for about 20 bucks, new, incl shipping from China and the semi-professionals advice the Brymen BM235 which costs about 95 bucks brand new, excl shipping.
I realize one meter is no meter, you need to be able to check yours if anything is off. So I decide to buy them both, it’s only 20 bucks extra and the cheaper one is quite liked too, so why not? I see a funny GM328A meter gadget for 3 pin diodes and whatnot for 15 bucks and get that one too.
Realising also, that my electronic work and interest is growing and that maybe it is time for an oscilloscope too. Go into the deep end of measuring and the semi-professionals kinda agree on the Rigol DS1054Z as a great beginners scope, so that one is in the back of my mind/on the wannahave list. Meanwhile I also read up on calibrating Digital Multi Meters and find the ‘DMM Check Plus‘ which comes with a proper calibration report so you can always verify your meters and their measured results, or compare to each other how precise they are, mmm yum, I like that even better ! š
Slowly slowly the meters arrive, and while I’m making a post about the different meters, I see a picture of the inside of the Voltcraft VC175
And I notice 2 fuses… so I open it up and with the new Brymen BM235 I check the fuses, and the 10A 5600V one is working, but the 0.5A 600V is broken. Would it.. could it be?
I order a few spare fuses and once they arrive I replace the broken one and voilĆ ! No more dashes and reading normal values….
So now having 4 Digital Multi Meters, of which 3 are working fine (fluke is still flakey), one gadgety one, an oscilloscope and a calibrated meter checker/tester, when all I needed was to replace one fuse? Was it?
Happy sampling ! š
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MoonBlog 5.6 yielding
one day, one wakes up, to the inevitable
that one has been avoiding so long
or afraid of
tried to soften the blow
and there you sit
in your knickers
awake
cold
dumbfucked
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MoonBlog 34.5 annihilation
āThe (un)bearable lightness of beingā¦ā
“2 days of no transit definition. All 9 centres white. A rare opportunity for Reflectors to savour the complete absence of any kind of pressure from without and within. Difficult to find the right words to express the delight I am experiencing in this limitless space and time, the weightlessness of the body moving around as if floating. No definition, no structure, no mind interfering in this experience of āthe (un)bearable lightness of just being there – in wonderā¦ā
Reflectors around the globe ā watch out for those days and find a way to be by yourself in those rare momentsā¦ you might be up for a surprise!”
and: “It happened again today… yes – it’s difficult to describe in words Isabel Moreira. I imagine that’s why some people use drugs to have that kind of experience. Maybe later on something pops up to share more with my Reflector kin… For now I am just savouring this cosmic bath… in silence… ?” – Nisarg B. Nikiel
What is this notion of a cosmic bath? Right now the Moon is in Gate 34 forming a temporary conditioned definition with my Gate 20. Besides we’re not here to live the Transits themselves, and even then, our individual experience will always be different, regardless of what the resulting chart looks like. The chart is not the life (!)
The other day (August 21st 2020), Earth was in Gate 30 line 5, which I do not have in my chart, nor do I have Gate 41, but I’ve never seriously felt more depressed and suicidal than ever before, when for instance I was in much more dire situations/outer circumstances. No I was just sitting there on my bed, watching tv, a comedy even, and I became deeply depressed and suicidal. This Gate 30 has always been a huge trigger for me. Nothing cosmic or bath-like for me, unless it was to drown myself in, to die.
There are no fairy tales in Human Design and certainly no homogenization, so when there are no channels formed by the Transits, it does not have to mean anything at all, and most certainly not for all Reflectors, no made up surprises, nothing the same for anyone/everyone else. Even when ‘no definition’ shows up. Nothing is fixed, not positive not negative.
Weirdo in the mail about this post here: SunBlog 11.5 the philanthropist (in Detriment) Read more
MoonBlog 51.1 reference
When I started to live on my own, as a young kid still, I would have a coffee and a few cigarettes in the morning, and just fiddle around (pre internet dayz). Then only around lunch time I would eat something, and then dinner again, later on in the evening a cookie perhaps. And did so for many, many years.
In 2009 I stopped smoking and in 2011 I got conditioned to eat breakfast, (at the International Osho Resort) and have eaten breakfast ever since. And have become more overweight ever since. No blame to the resort though.
Understanding what an emotional eater I am, how easily most anything/everything is an emotional trigger, for good, for bad, for happy, for sad, I like eating. And with my PHS of Open Taste and Smell, and undefined Solar Plexus, I eat š
I have esophagus issues, since about 2 years, probably a rupture somewhere at the lower esophageal sphincter (LES), cause of overweight, the only remedy; lose weight.
I went to see a dietitian and she did help me see some interesting things about my food intake, and so some things were changed radically, other things actually increased, like my breakfast intake and to double-up on lunch, since I was underfeeding myself in the morning and at lunch and therefor over eating on way too fatty foods during dinner, besides the whole taste/smell thing. But I kept eating, eating to much, too often.
Maybe not according to any schedule, or system, but according to my body.
So 2 weeks ago I got more esophagus pain, like it was contracting a muscle, or like a leg cramp, but then in your chest, very painful. I checked my weight, and I was heavier then when I started dieting… I knew I was over eating again, and so I quit.
But most importantly, I quit breakfast. Now I just have a coffee in the morning, some interwebz, and then only around lunch time, I eat again.
And that late night cookie is 1 again, not 2, or more.
And I feel a slow deeper layer of feeling fine again, of feeling healthier for eating less, and also, less often, and less emo triggered. I feel lighter inside, even if I have not checked my weight, or am going to check in a while š
It is so funny to not have ‘hunger’ issues when following the body’s correctness, for not eating since late night cookie until lunch. Not feeling woozy either. Just very naturally fine. And landing back, digesting exactly like it was before.
Your body already knows, now get out of the ff-ing way.
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MoonBlog 12.6 metamorphosis
Weirdos in the mail
FRI 23:49 Received FB friendship request, accept
Me: Hi, thanks for connecting ?
Weirdo: thank you for reaching out and accepting Sjef!
Me: Is it ok to share your (birth) data with me?
Mine are at the bottom here:
https://www.mcha.nl/reflector/
Weirdo: why would you ask for it Sjef?
Me: I always ask for it
https://www.facebook.com/sjef.romijn/posts/1048372788868833
[4/6 Reflector, PLL-DLR, RAX of Rulership] public service announcement:
If you make a FB friend request, but can not even say ‘Hi’ back, you’re out.
If you’re into HD but don’t want to share your HD chart with me, you’re out.
If you ask me HD questions, but don’t (want to) get into studying it, then ask 20 questions in groups, you’re out.
Weirdo: why?
this is private, no?
Me: but it is not a matter of why
it is either correct ofr you to share, or not correct
that is Living Your Design, to follow through on your correctness
not yout mind
Weirdo: if you will explain other than just request it would be easier for me to related to
Me: no, that is your mind being in control
Weirdo: no
Me: which is fine, but then your answer, falsly, is no
which is different than your Inner Authority saying no
Weirdo: falsely? can you explain?
Me: as long as you come up with arguments, like it is private, it is mind deciding
it is not S&A
mind is defending something
but like I said in the link
if, for whichever ‘reason’ you don’t share it
then we’re not going to be fb friends
I only interact with people I do have a chart of
as fb friends that is
Weirdo: I am not coming up with an argument but requesting to understand the why. I think it more than fair.
Me: fair is mind
understanding is mind
Im not here to answer your mind
nor are you here to answer mine
it is correct or not
those are arguments
and I have explained it
Weirdo: my Son needs my attention. whether you wish to be my friend or not is your own call.
Me: absolutely
Weirdo: trust is something you build
Me: is a mental discernment
but if that is your current answer, perfectly fine, no objection
enjoy your day ?
Weirdo: i invite you to read some of the things I am writing about friendship and trust
linkedin link
thank you.
Me: I dont have Linked In and Im not interested in the opinions of your mind, arguments
you dont want to share your chart, for whatever reason
so I unfriended you
Weirdo: we will talk more
Me: no we wont
Weirdo: thank you. have a great day Sir.
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MoonBlog 30.5 Irony
When people think it’s about the shininess of the content of the bargain they propose
but it’s all about the initiation, which is irrelevant to you or the contents themselves.
It is simply correct, or, not correct.
Not because of the shiny things you offer, or the results you propose.
Correctness does not care about the this & that of it.
add-on/edit: unless the bargain is sex… I guess, then yes, promised shiny results are key š
But when you try to bargain something that is not sex, aahh well
get ready to be surprised š
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MoonBlog 52.5 Explanation
Topic raised: “on the fringe and conspiratorial vs. those who are not” & “if the difference here is between individual and tribal circuitry respectively.“
To me, it does not seem related to circuitry or even mechanics.
If one has control issues, which is a psychological disorder, then one is doubtful and in ‘against’ mode.
If one is the passenger (again), there is only observation and experience, mind is no longer running the show, and there is no more ‘issue’.
To be in this world but not of it
walking around like a tourist, through lock-downs and Ikea parking lot lines, none of it is personal (anymore).
Whereas the conspiracy theorists, (regardless of whether their particular conspiracy may be factually true!!), still have a (entirely made up) personal stake in outcomes. It’s just ego/mind.
Just like being born tall or short is not personal, but here we are incarnated into this body this time, well, see what it does, how it moves, runs, lays on the couch.
Instead of imposing will and arguments on how and what, life ‘should’ look like. The vanity and intellectual arrogance…
Mind you, I was deeply into conspiracies and anger issues and make-ability syndrome, and much more similar mental illness issues.
That is how I see them now, my mind was running the show and it was sick. Now it’s just crazy but no longer running things. Quite a comfortable/pleasant difference.
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Moon Blog 29.4 Directness
Weirdos in the mail:
Weirdo: Hey
I’m a certified social media moderatore
I’m reporting you to facebook
I will report any comment I find abusive
based on my training as a modetator
Me: can I see the certificate?
Weirdo:(thumbs-up)
you’re a bull
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Moonblog 8.2 service
Moonblog 8.2
Sometimes relationships, friendships have had their run. Itās time to let go, and they simply present themselves as such.
Blissfully unaware of that, but then the other starts projecting on you, and when you tell them youāre not ok with that projection, they even tell you to doubt, that you know any better about what you, or your life is like, or about.
Another, out of the blue starts calling you, or what you do/not do, stupid. Well, you may indeed find what I do, or not do stupid, but it sure as shit does not make me stupid.
All of a sudden you realize, theyāre trying to hold you back, that youāre going places they do not want you to go, or go in a different way. But that is not up to them, far from it.
Of course the danger is, that youāve become so distant to certain things in life, maybe perhaps too aloof, or even āunemotionalā, that you donāt see the forest for the trees. Maybe they hint at a blind spot, that is hard for ourselves to see.
But when the chord of interrelating is indeed cut, and you suddenly feel more free again, when you realize how sticky and controlling it all has become, how much drama was created by that other, ratcheting…
…maybe just maybe, you are indeed better off without them, and it is time for a new network, or some new people in it.
Only -you- can ever know, what is truly correct for you, so:
-donāt hold back
-take no shit
-enjoy yourself
āMerry happy fucking Kiron Returnā
Edit/add-on: the funny thing is, they think they are disqualifying you, when they are disqualifying themselves.
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MoonBlog 28.1 preparation
I’m about to throw in the towel, leave all these FB HD groups. Again š
The influx of newbies who are drawn in by people like Jenna Zoe selling people ‘Reflector muffins’ and ‘dieting by Type’, combined with the groups admin/moderators too uninterested in keeping the contents about HD.
I really enjoy sharing experience and knowledge with others about HD, in individual sessions, classes and in those groups.
But it seems it is just not my network anymore, when other Certified or semi Professionals also use such groups for shooting from the hip and just blabber from their minds.
I don’t care about the newbie doing so, it is what we are here for, to help guide the way, shine the light, give proper info.
But when the trained, or even certified start doing so, I know it is no longer ‘safe’ for me anymore. When some caretakers take a break themselves, and the groups instantly become much much worse.
Now I know it is in part the Transits cause every single year around this time, this notion happens. I know it is the 4th line overwhelm and sense of abdication.
Is it my Kiron Return of last May? Is it the caving in of the structure of the Cross of Planning too?
I just don’t feel available anymore to the masses, the lurkers, the silent readers, and the network seems depleted, or at least shrinking.
Anyways, maybe see you again elsewhere
(For now, I left a couple of badly moderated groups, and blocked a few more idiots, maybe it helps)
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MoonBlog 60.5 leadership
Relevant to several FB HD groups:Ā The convo about being bullied or not is a side issue but taking it away from the real issue, the cause for most of these arguments/discussions, where we no longer speak about HD but about how we speak about HD, and how we speak to each other:
Can you be in a group, where people have different ways of talking?
Do you seek to impose ways of communication on others? Like safe spaces and whatnot. Are you easily offended?
Do you argue the tone, and how it (supposedly) -feels- to you (which is thinking btw) what the other has said, but never intended.
Do you seek to manipulate your experiences of life and of conversations with others?
Are your decisions and opinions run by your arrogant mind in a group that seeks to support in moving away from that same mind?
Etc etc.
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MoonBlog 33.2 surrender
When your deeper cravings, wishes and desires, drive your actions, become your motives. To not be aware of these deeper wants, hunger, longing. Not sit with them but resolve them, trying to, filling countless round holes with square pegs (pun intended).
As opposed to be aware of them, honoring them, allowing them to be. To be a lone human on a barren planet, looking for love, looking, looking. Where your conditioned conditions meet the other’s conditioned conditions. Where you find, but not just quite, or seems not, is not, as we knee-jerk onwards. Uh and ah !
MoonBlog 33.4 dignity
Supposedly the Buddha has said:
āMy teaching is a raft whereon men may reach the far shore The sad fact is that so many mistake the raft for the shoreā
But what I see often with people dabbling with Human Design and in the HD FaceBook groups is people bitching about that raft, thinking they can take a bus instead, or get a canoe. Get a ride with someone else instead.
And then others ask if there are accommodations on the raft, with sheets and bedding, what time is lunch actually? Wanting the day to day program, stating ahead that they’re not going to do the 2 o-clock meditations ever, ow and probably skip that other class too cause someone else did it and they did not like it.
Then there are those that seek discounts for the crossing without ever knowing the initial price.
Others complain about not being able to swim, or only seek to go when the weather is fine and they have a few free holi-days.
And thus they never reach that far shore, never get to experience what life is going to be like after. Seeing the raft, or teaching as a means to not go, to not ‘get their feet wet’ as a hurdle, when the raft is only just a means to get somewhere else.
It is not about the raft at all. It is not about all these Outer Circumstances.
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MoonBlog 54.6 Selectivity
As someone who is in the experiment well over 11 years, and providing my own Transit/Lunar Cycle service, I find the Transit Tool provided by myBodyGraph very advanced, very elaborate too. Maybe even too advanced for beginners.
However, there is so much functionality in it, some obvious by just clicking here and there, some perhaps not so obvious.
So is it for beginners? Yes and no, for some it will be an online honey pot and resource of incredible information, for others it might be a nerd fest of overwhelm.
At the same time, the information that is provided, like all Retrograde Planets, and when they start or end doing so, and other statistics, the live view is fascinating.
Over time one will use a few key functions I presume, you may gravitate towards some different ones than I would, and because it is so elaborate and vast this is all possible.
When having access to Steps 2 and 3 on just one chart, but then not having that same access in the Transit Tool is unfortunate and only overcome by buying the unlimited access.
And sometimes I end up in another information layer I need to remind myself to click the exit cross on the right and come back to the big overview of menus again, where I can then play again with which information to show:
Themes, keynotes and Lines under Planetary Activations
Keynotes, Not-Self Keynotes, Not-Self Questions under Centers
Keynotes under Channels
Elaborate Ordering options under Gates
The many, many ‘hover mouse over’ information baloons
And once activating some of the many options in the ‘show’ menu under the Moon Cycle, another vast bank of info opens up to play with, which I enjoy very much, which I can imagine any beginner struggling with, but starting out with selecting and deselecting which options to show, may help there indeed.
The Ephemeris part did not phase me that much, but can imagine other people have a field day looking forwards or back to certain events, although limited to the years 1900 – 2060. Ok I tried actually and got from December 31st 1899 until May 30st of 2061 š
Add on: What is odd to me and may confuse others, is the use of the blue and green color. In the MMI, when making a Transit Chart, what is Resonant or you, becomes Green and what forms a Channel (Harmonic) is Blue. In this tool it is the other way around. Luckily there is also the Three Activations view, where the Red & Black of your own chart remain intact and Transits are Green, as seen in the picture top right.
Do check out the descriptions and screenshots here: https://www.mybodygraph.com/shop/product/transit-tool before buying, to see if it tickles you funny, or perhaps not.
A big thanks to Pontus Erik Karlsson (5/1 Reflector) from https://www.thekeytoyourself.com for being paramount in the idea, development and implementation of this online resource.
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